Posted by: Admin | January 19, 2010

Life In The Slow Lane

I think I’ve uncovered the mystery of why so many older folks drive so slow.  I think it’s actually so much more than driving, I think it’s a metaphor for their new found lives.  These folks have finally discovered how to live their lives in the slow lane.  They’ve learned that nothing horrible happens if they’re not rushing.  That the earth doesn’t shatter if it takes them 10 minutes longer to get to the grocery store and that they’d rather spend all day doing something that brings them happiness rather than get irritated by all those honking horns and tailgaters. 

The longer I’m unemployed the more I’ve learned to just coast thru my days.  I don’t need to think about all that much. I don’t really have a schedule or agenda.  I do things as they come to me (if they come to me) and in general, my entire life has slowed to a crawl.  On the days where I’m not freaking out because I have no job, it’s been a nice change. 

There actually seem to be a lot of similarities between retirement & unemployment.   Most notably, the idea that you don’t actually have anything to do each day.  Sure, you can fill your time with activities of your choice, because after all, your time, truly is your time.  But you don’t have to do anything.  And, while this is a happy time for those people who have worked their whole lives and who have earned a retired life of relaxation, I don’t think it’s necessarily a good thing for those of us who are unemployed. 

For 6 months I’ve been coasting along happily, in the slow lane (ok, maybe occasionally I was flicking off some people behind me…).  But 2010 came around and I’ve actually had a ton of things to do, my days are filled with activities, my weekends are filled with real estate and I’m having an incredibly difficult time readjusting (if you’re a regular reader, you’ve probably noticed my blogging schedule is all screwed up!).  All of a sudden I can hear those car horns honking, I can feel my stress level rising and I’m really struggling to shift back and change lanes.  I’m guess I’m glad it’s happening now so that I can be fully readjusted if I ever do enter the world of full time employment, but re-engaging my brain and speeding up my life has definitely been challenging. 

So, my dear blog readers.. that’s my update, it’s why I can’t seem to keep a normal blog schedule, it’s why sometimes I write stuff that makes no sense and it’s also why I’m back to having sleep issues because some of my stress & anxiety have come back full-force, and I can’t sleep properly anymore.  So, although 2010 has started off well, I can tell already that it’s going to be a year of change for me!

How’s 2010 been for you so far?



  1. I posted what you said in the slow lane on my blog. I hope that is ok as it is so true we are all in to big of a hurry to pass by the things that are important in our lives. I feel sometimes why rush as we all have a ending date so why hurry to it.
    You will be fine and you can email me and vent all you want it helps me to focus on others and not my diseases..
    Have a wonderful day…

  2. I use to get so frustrated with the “Sunday Drivers”. Now when I go out and I am behind one of them I think, “I am no hurry because I don’t really have anywhere to go and no time restraints.” Yes, I have my little errands – going to the store, the gas station and soon the dealership to get an oil change (another unwanted expense, but if I want the car to take me to interviews, then I have to do it, grudgingly), but they are nothing to rush.

    Also, when I meet up with a few of my former co-workers on Fridays for lunch, I know I have all the time in the world, but they have to get back to the office within an hour. It is nice to hear how they are doing without me – they miss me terribly and are frustrated because no one knows how to do what I did and help them out (insert laugh – company loss!).

    I had an interview last week and thought it had gone well. The HR director told me that she would be calling candidates back this week, but I haven’t heard a word. It would be a very nice place to work – a long commute – but you know, I will probably get stuck behind a “Sunday Driver” on the freeway and not be bothered by it (well, maybe alittle if I am running late to work).

    Hang in there everyone! We will all find something.

    • Stevie ~ there’s really something “freeing” about being on my own time & schedule every single day! Fingers crossed that you hear from that HR Director early this week!

  3. You are doing your part. I know things are bad for those that have lost jobs, homes, love ones, but life will not wait so we must keep going and things will get better.

    No tea even nighttime. warm milk .
    Go to your health food store or pharmacy and get melatonin strongest they have it is not addictive and as we get older we loose it. Your room is be dark so the brain knows it is sleep time..

    I am sure you will see it works.
    Also a soft lavender oil in the room. Lavender relaxes.

    What they did was not right, but don’t let them control you, let it go…
    Take care and come talk to me any time…
    Your new friend Marie

  4. I totally understand what you mean about your schedule. I’ve been making an attempt to get back on a ‘normal’ schedule now for the past few weeks. 2010 has been much busier than 2009 with interviews and such.

    While I do believe 2010 will be a year of change, it’s started off a bit crappy for me already. Earlier this week I was offered my dream job and asked to start on Tuesday. Then on Tuesday before I even started, they retracted their offer!
    😦 I’ve never had a company do such a thing. Odd.

    As for the sleeping issues, I have some anti-anxiety meds from the doctor that I take from time to time if it gets really bad. I also like the sleepy time tea. It helps me to relax a bit. I am also forcing myself out of bed in the morning to try to regulate my schedule.

    I hope you get back on track with your sleep schedule soon. I know how frustrating that can be!

    • Christine ~ I’m so incredibly sorry that they retracted their offer. I can’t even imagine feeling the excitement & relief of an offer for a dream job only to have it yanked away. I’d have to assume that perhaps there were internal things going on that you were not privvy to that would indicate that maybe, although it was a dream job, it wasn’t (or isn’t) a dream company? I can only hope that you find yourself with an even better opportunity SOON!

  5. Honey it sounds to me like you are giving it all you got. Please don’t let the grip of depression grab you.
    You are not alone and I am sure something good will come your way soon. The horn honking is nothing wear a head set and listen to soft music it will keep yo very calm not only in traffic but other daily activities.

    To sleep try medication for 10 min before bed, and a hot bath maybe together.
    My prayers and thoughts are with you and be strong I know you will….Gigi

    • Gigi ~ Thanks so much for your encouraging words, I really appreciate it! I definitely have my good days & my bad days… lately more good than bad though so, I really shouldn’t complain and I know that other people have it far worse. The good thing about blogging is that I can vent away my fustrations and hopefully focus on more positive things!

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